Some horror stories involve ghosts. Some involve zombies. Some involve vampires. And then there’s one horror story that happened to me recently – Appraisal on Halloween Day!!! 🎃

You heard me right…You might be wondering this is serious post as its about appraisal that’s where the real fun begins. Stay tuned till the end.

And yes, one fine day, the announcement came – my appraisal slot was scheduled in the morning along with others, and by evening the team had planned a full Halloween celebration with Halloween treats.

In my mind, what the hell… Is this Trick or Treat!

Honestly, didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. But while getting my slide deck ready with all my OKRs, suddenly everything started making sense.

The excitement, fear, suspense, anxiety, overthinking, emotional damage… everything will be felt in one single day!!

Before the appraisal call, most of us go through the same mental process. We start replaying the entire year in our head.

The late-night work, weekend support, handling escalations, doing work beyond role, helping teammates, sharing free knowledge, your idea but someone else getting credit in the meeting, firefighting stakeholder drama, and surviving expectations with no monetary rewards…

And somewhere inside, one small hopeful voice starts talking.

• Maybe this year will be different.
• Maybe this time they really noticed my work.
• May be this year, your team grown in 3 digits, atleast not single digit!
• Maybe this is finally my year.

Then the call starts.

Management begins with the usual sweet intro.

“You did really well this year.”
“We appreciate your contribution.”
“You created strong impact.”

For a few minutes, you actually start feeling good. Maybe this is going well. Maybe today there is no horror story.

Then comes one small word.

But.

That one word is enough to change the entire mood.

Ghosts from the Past Never Really Leave

Halloween has ghosts. Appraisal has ghosts too.

Not the scary white-saree type. Corporate ghosts.

Almost every appraisal ghost comes from something buried somewhere in the past… and trust me, they all suddenly wake up during appraisal season. 😂

• that one missed deadline with no financial impact
• that missed team bonding activity
• that one stakeholder minor complaint
• that one a mistake you made 8 months ago that somehow nobody forgot.

Funny thing, right?

Imagine your performance appraisal discussion. Let’s assume you have performed very well.

You may have done business development right the whole year giving 100% ROI ideas to your management, taken initiatives, led without a title, given creative ideas and solutions, handled escalations, worked weekends, streamlined processes, saved critical situations, shared “FREE” unlimited knowledge, helped others get promoted before you did!

After almost years of dealing with difficult situations, being insulted, named and shamed, having ideas taken without credit, and watching your contributions being presented as someone’s, you still maintained your integrity.

Imagine you have been to your team’s promotion party. You went little late due to traffic. However no activities were started. Team decided to have a starter until bowling lanes opened. You were on time in that case. You went and wished your manager for his promotion from Manager to Director. You sat near a team mate. Your manager kept a plate with one small piece of leftover food which someone was having in another table. You smile and you were forced to take that and eat.

In the back of your end, you think irrespective of effort for more than 2 yrs, all you get is someone’s left over. You were not given the eligible appraisal anytime. Always paper appreciations with no monetary rewards. Are you not worthwhile even asking, “Hey, do you want to have any juice at least?” Are you not worthwhile to order anything though they very well know you are one of the core reasons behind their promotion. You changed their mindset, you changed their way of thinking and working.

With all tears inside, smile outside. You played bowling. There were few teammates who reached towards the end of the bowling, still the entire team waited for them to complete. However, you were not able to bear this insult and you leave the place around 9PM after bowling. You cried throughout the journey of 16 kms to your house, uncontrollably. You were grieving the difference between what you had given and how you felt you were being treated in return.

This kind of emotional abuse and disrespect, any normal manager will never do. This is beyond the office politics which you have faced and very well know it is part and parcel of corporate life. But, this extent, because they wanted to exploiting your personal and financial situation. Their sadist attitude of “What can you do about it?” was painful. You never told anyone about this incident. They are always projected as a great leader.

And after all that and many more such incidents, imagine if you get the feedback like this!!

“You need more Human Touch.”

That still doesn’t count as Human Touch?

Huh? Seriously?

Appraisal Mantra 1 – The “You Still Need to Improve” Formula

Over the years, noticed one funny thing. Almost every manager seems to follow this unwritten rule during appraisal season

Even if you achieved 100% of your goals, they find one area of improvement.

There must always be one red or amber. One area where employee lacks.

Of course, no one is perfect. Everyone has something to improve.

But sometimes, genuinely find this funny.

After every promotion to a managerial role, have seen those promoted employees going for Managerial and Leadership trainings.

Used to genuinely wonder… wait, didn’t they get promoted because they already exhibited those skills? 🤔

Appraisal Mantra 2 – Trick Reasons?

Appraisal season feels exactly the same.

You walk into the discussion hoping for treat… a good hike, a promotion, top rating, bigger bonus, better role, stronger recognition.

Then Management starts with all the sweet things. Almost too sweet.

Great performance, strong contribution, valuable resource, leadership visibility, high impact.

You relax. Nice. This is the REAL TREAT 🍬

And suddenly treat becomes trick… budget constraints, limited promotion slots, market correction, internal calibration, maybe Mid-year!

The Final Villain Entry

Every horror movie has one final villain.

Appraisal season also has one.

The Bell Curve.

Whenever explanations become difficult, this final monster enters.

Not enough budget? Bell curve.

No promotion slot? Bell curve.

Cannot justify lower hike? Bell curve.

Need a reason to downgrade 1 to 2? Bell curve.

At this point, genuinely want to know who exactly this Bell Curve is.

Mysterious, invisible, powerful, impossible to challenge… and somehow stronger than actual performance.

Before and After: Appraisal Edition

Before appraisal, you are hopeful, confident, and full of energy. After appraisal, technically you are alive… but slightly dead inside.

You smile professionally and say, “Thank you for the feedback.”

Then you end the call, mute yourself, stare at the screen for a few minutes, and question life choices.

That meme picture suddenly feels too real.

Jokes apart, sometimes the real horror is not the appraisal itself. It is the gap between expectation and reality.

Still, one thing I keep reminding myself – one rating cannot define your entire year, and one discussion cannot define your worth.

But if your appraisal falls on Halloween…

Remember that, Trick is officially confirmed 😊

One Last Plot Twist

Hardly few came to wear something on their face. I randomly had done the makeup with the combination of both scary marks and also blood droplets coming from my eyes on that day. Applied blood above eyebrows.

Just before few minutes, my team informed that we need to do ramp walk and enact. I just did showing a scary and sad face smile as before and after appraisal. It was completely unplanned and spontaneously, but 100% coincidence created by GOD. So the pictures on the left and right are AI edited to differentiate. 🙇‍♀️

Below is the original photo I had taken on that day after the event.

Disclaimer

Yes, my appraisal genuinely happened on Halloween. Because of the enact, was nominated for a one day training with FREE FOOD and FREE CAB by Manager.

The ghosts, villains? It is just a little extra Halloween effect!!!

Read my other blog post here.